Walter White is the worst husband, father, man, human-being of all time. Over the past five seasons of AMC's 'Breaking Bad,' we have seen him go from being a sad, nerdy high school chemistry teacher with cancer to a ruthless, murderous, awful, despicable, conniving, terrifying asshole. I think I speak for everyone out there who is not a sociopath when I say this: I hate Walter White. We are all rooting for Walter's demise, and we do not care if justice happens below, within or above the law.
Last night, in the third-to-last episode of 'Breaking Bad' (watch a behind-the-scenes video above), Walter did something worse than all the other things he has done. Yes, worse than watching Jesse Pinkman's girlfriend die in bed and worse than poisoning that little kid and worse than all the awful things he has done to Skyler and Hank and his son and everyone else in the world. That is a big claim, because Walt has already done so much evil. But Walt out-Walted himself last night.
SPOILERS. After confessing that Hank, his brother-in-law, was murdered as a result of his drug boss lifestyle, Walt's wife came at him hard with a butcher knife. Walt fought her off while his son, Walt Jr., watched; the son finally broke the fight up and called the cops. Walt fled, but first he grabbed their infant daughter, Holly. He kindnapped his own damn kid! Needless to say, Skyler was pissed.
What Walt did was terrible, but maybe not as bad as the other things he has done. He showed that he is still human when, at the end of the episode, he called Skyler. He said some evil things, but he also exonerated her because he knew the cops were listening. And he ultimately ended up dropping off the baby with some firemen before he was picked up by his lawyer Saul Goodman's vacuum cleaner guy. The implication was that Walt will take a new identity and start a new life.
But what if Walter White tried to win back Skyler right now (or later)? What would he do to apologize for all the nasty things he has done, and to win her affection? Like anybody else, Walter would make Skyler a mixtape. This is Walter White's "Please Forgive Me Skyler" Playlist.
Usher - 'Climax'
Walt's relationship with Skyler has hit its violent climax: what next? Is it too late? Can they start again, start anew, go back to the beginning? This Diplo-produced track by Usher provides an ambiguous answer. But that is Walt's goal for the opening tune. He wants Skyler to know that he knows that he has done something so awful that there might be no fifth chance, no future. Skyler will appreciate Walt's honesty, and the uncertainty about what follows the climax will intrigue her.
Taylor Swift - 'Begin Again'
The answer is: Yes. Walt and Skyler can start over. When Taylor Swift sings, "You said you never met one girl who had as many James Taylor records as you, but I do," Skyler will remember when her and Walt had the exact same conversation one night when they first started dating. They stayed up all night long talking and listening to James Taylor's 'Fire and Rain' on repeat in Walt's dorm. Skyler will remember how happy she was. She will want to begin again.
Drake - 'Fireworks'
Skyler is floating in lovely memories, so Walt will throw 'Fireworks' at her. But this will confuse her because she does not know Walt likes Drake. Walt has never told anyone he likes Drake. It's a secret. Mysterious, but romantic. And, at the beginning of the song, as Drake says "Money just changed everything, I wonder how life without it would go," Skyler will get it. Walt did it for the money, yes, but he did it for her love, too. (Walt will also get bonus points because Alicia Keys is on this song, and she is one of Skyler's favorite vocalists.)
Genesis - 'In Too Deep'
Walt pushed Skyler away. But he had to. He did not want her to be too involved in his dirty deeds. That changed over time, and he dragged her down with him. He got in too deep, over his head, and the good part of him drowned in the drug-money-power game. But there once was a time when he was in too deep in love. With Skyler. Who, by the way, is a huge Phil Collins fan.
Bon Jovi - 'Wanted Dead Or Alive'
Real Talk: Skyler has been truly, deeply, insanely turned on by Walt ever since she found out what a ruthless, money-making, gun-slinging boss he really is. Walt knows this. Walt is an outlaw. He is Skyler's Outlaw. He is on the run, wanted dead or alive. That's hot.
Adele - 'Someone Like You'
This is Skyler's favorite song. Everytime she hears it, she cries. No matter where she is when it comes on - the car, the crib, the carwash - she cries. She cannot control herself. It makes her think of Walt. She has never met anyone quite like him.
Michael Jackson - 'Man In The Mirror'
Then: BOOM. Walt will hit Skyler with the ultimate Mike Jackson classic about duplicity and self-reflection and forgiveness and love and everything that is good in the world. Her Adele sobs will turn into tears of joy as Jackson sings about Making The Change. "Maybe Walt is a good person," Skyler will think. "Maybe he, too, can Make The Change. There is a future for us."